PARENTS across the UK were today disappointed to learn that pouring strawberry flavoured medicine down the neck of their sniveling infant does not, in fact, count towards a portion of fruit or veg.
Angus McShart, a government spokesman, said “Many parents treat these medicines as a cure-all. Baby Jack sneezes and they immediately reach for the bathroom cabinet.
“We’re rearing a generation of children dependent on Calpol. All because mummy wants her 7.30 glass of pinot”.
Angela Buxon from Cardiff was not impressed with the news. She said, ‘I was up at 5.30 this morning because Maisie decided she wanted to watch ‘Frozen’. Again.
“I didn’t talk to an adult for 12 hours straight, so if a little ‘snifter’ helps bedtime along, then I’m going to pour that magic pink s**t down my kid’s throats like a farmer stuffing a goose”.